About Me… I’m a data protection and privacy (let’s call it ‘Data Privacy’; it’s easier to type) specialist with twenty years’ experience of apply- ing data protection law in a wide range of industries. I’ve worked in large global organisations including a few house- hold names, but I’ve also advised small businesses and individuals so I understand that your needs are very different from those of a large corporation, as are your time, priorities and, of course, your budget. In another life, I’m also a designer/maker, so I know some of the challenges that come with running your own business, especially in the creative sphere where you’re the designer, the maker, the marketer, the salesperson, the book-keeper, the administrator, the tea boy/girl and everything else too. All at the same time. And usually with only one pair of hands. I believe in taking the mystery out of data privacy and keeping it simple. I know that one size doesn’t fit all. I also believe that good advice shouldn’t cost a fortune or be cloaked in manage- ment-speak and mystery. My mission is to provide you with simple, straightforward, data privacy services tailored to your needs at a fair and affordable price. I don’t look like the guru in this picture - I’m not often quite that smiley and orange is not my colour - but I do know my stuff and I can explain it to you in plain English. I’ll help you understand what your business really needs to do to stay on the right side of data protection law and help you do the best for you, your busi- ness and your customers.
Your friendly neighbourhood data privacy shop is…
just write me a privacy policy please, guru! £50
Help with marketing and contacting customers  		£25
Help, this is an emergency! The worst has happened and I don’t know what to do. £190
Taking the stress out of data privacy!
About you… You’re an artist, a designer/maker or a craftsperson. You create things. Or you’re a sole trader, a small business, a one-man-band. You provide a product or service to your customers. Or you might even be a small independent charity or a not-for- profit group helping to make things better in your community. Whoever you are and whatever you do; whether it’s painting portraits or kitchens, arranging flowers or mortgages, rescuing hedgehogs or unloved furniture, that’s your thing. You’re good at it and you just want to get on with it. You don’t want to have to spend time thinking about things like data protection, because that is definitely not your thing. Yet you know it’s important. You know you probably do need to think about about it, but you don’t understand it, or you’re too busy, or it’s too complicated, or it’s too expensive, or maybe you simply don’t know where to start or who to ask… That’s where I come in. Data protection is my thing and I can take the stress out of it so you can just get on with doing your thing with one less thing to worry about. And that has to be a good thing.
About Data Privacy Unless you’ve been living off-grid for the last couple of years (and if you have, you’ve come to the right place and we definitely need to talk) you’ll have heard of data protec- tion, most likely in the form of ‘GDPR’ (the ‘General Data Protection Regulation’), the most recent European data protection law. GDPR and data protection in general can seem compli- cated but in reality it’s actually fairly simple. The problem is that it’s been the subject of a lot of scaremongering; some deliberate by consultancy firms creating fear in order to sell their services, and some down to simple but all too common misunderstanding of the law. At heart, it’s all about using peoples’ personal information fairly, legally and securely, being open and honest about how you’re using it and respecting people’s privacy. The law is not intended to tie you up in knots that stop your business from functioning. On the contrary, if you get the balance right you’ll build the trust of your customers, which can only be a good thing for your business.
I know what your business really needs Sounds like a big claim, doesn’t it? Well, I’m the guru, so what do you expect? Having specialised in this field for two decades I really understand data privacy, both in theory and in practice. I can separate the real risks from the scaremongering and I can prescribe the right actions for the real data privacy issues your business is likely to face. Some things The Privacy Guru doesn’t do: legalese; management-speak and buzz- words; charts, graphs and matrices; grey suits (you don’t see any stock pictures of generic smiling ‘executives’ on this website, do you?), lengthy reports, scare stories, one-size-fits-all, over-complication, upselling, cross-selling, hidden fees and charges. And I definitely don’t do charging you huge amounts of your hard-earned money for services and advice you don’t need. What The Privacy Guru does do: simple, friendly and approachable; honest opinions; plain English; common sense; listening to what your business actually wants and needs and fitting around you; mixed metaphors (as you’ll have noticed from this website); simple and clear guidance; and upfront pricing. I also do a 10% discount for students, recent graduates, registered charities and not- for-profit community organisations.
But does any of this actually affect you? The short answer is yes, data privacy applies to your business if you use or hold personal information about any individual people. That’s most likely to be your cus- tomers, but it includes employees if you’re lucky enough to have them, and even individual contacts within your suppliers. And if you do any kind of direct marketing to customers or prospective customers, have a mailing list or a website that uses cookies or otherwise collects information, data privacy most definitely needs to be on your to do list, if it isn’t already. The good news is that, although this means you will have certain responsibilities and obligations, they are unlikely to be complicated, expensive or time-consuming for most artists, creatives and very small businesses (unless you’re sitting in your office busily building the next Amazon or Google, of course, in which case things may be just a little more complex). See this chap on the right? He’s so happy because he’s no longer afraid of data privacy. And you needn’t be either, because The Privacy Guru is here to guide you through it.
I’m employing someone.  What do I need to do?  		£75 I Am I GDPR compliant?         £75
A look under the bonnet £125
I’m setting up a company.  What do I need to do? £130 I need to know how long I should keep customer information.  £15
I know what I want, thank you!
Hmmm…I’m not sure what I need.
I think I need a bit more hand-holding….
Advice/research/training by the hour. £50 first hour, then £30 p/h
Help me with scary contract stuff… £25
What I can offer you I can’t promise you quite the zen-like levels of calm of the guru in this photo, but I can certainly take the stress out of data privacy for you. I’ll do my thing so you’re free to just get on with doing yours. Take a look at the shop below, where you’ll find the services small busi- nesses most often need help with, along with a few options for those who don’t really know what they need yet, and a subscription option for those who’d like a bit of extra support. When you’ve decided what you’d like, just get in touch by e-mail or phone then take a deep breath and prepare for a weight to be lifted off your busy shoulders. If what you need isn’t listed, no problem - just get in touch. Whatever your data privacy concern, the Privacy Guru can probably help you with it!
So come on in!
Great! It’s probably one of these...
Well, try one of these… and if you still don’t see what you need, just get in touch!
10% discount for students, recent graduates and charities!
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